Happy Mothers Day

I was asked to give a talk today and I thought I would use it as my weekly post. Keep in mind they gave me very little time to write it, so mostly I just used the words of people more inspired than me. Hope you enjoy!

When Brian Hagen called me Yesterday to ask me to give a talk Today on Mothers day of all days you would think I would feel a little stressed out. But I think he must have a lot of practice in using trick psychology when asking people to talk because I remember him saying this should be really easy for you its ONLY a ten minute talk, and I thought OH yeah that’s easy no problem I can do that, until I sat down today to write my talk and realized ten minutes is like an eternity when it comes to speaking in sacrament meeting. So I think that was a little bit sneaky, but I truly am thankful for this chance to speak today.

You can look at Mother’s Day in several ways. I know a lot of women spend the day being suffocated by their own guilt brought on by self perceived sins. Now that I am a mother myself I can understand the temptation to allow those feelings to creep in, but I truly enjoyed spending my Mother’s day immersed in the encouraging words, and thoughtful counsel from the servants of the Lord.

As is usual when trying to accomplish any task in my household, as I sat down to write this talk I was bombarded by the kids asking questions, climbing all over me and wanting to share their excitement about how many sponge bobs he found in his mac and cheese. Despite Joshs best efforts to keep them at bay, it seemed as if somehow I was a magnet. Which made me realize, that no matter what, there is no replacement for a mom. Just like there is no replacement for a Dad. They are totally different and each has its unique place and job. Which is what my talk is based on today. A woman’s calling is to nurture a child. Again this can be viewed in many ways

Jeffrey R Holland said

“To the women within the sound of my voice who dearly want to be mothers and are not, I say through your tears and ours on that subject, God will yet, in days that lie somewhere ahead, bring “hope to [the] desolate heart.” As prophets have repeatedly taught from this pulpit, ultimately “no blessing shall be withheld” from the faithful, even if those blessings do not come immediately. In the meantime we rejoice that the call to nurture is not limited to our own flesh and blood.

In Pres Hinkleys talk called Your greatest Challenge Mother he says

I cannot talk directly to all of you. I have singled out one segment of this vast congregation, and that is you who are mothers. I might include those who will become mothers. What a wonderful thing you have done as mothers. You have given birth and nurtured children. You have entered into a partnership with our Father in Heaven to give mortal experience to His sons and daughters. They are His children and they are your children, flesh of your flesh, for whom He will hold you responsible. You have rejoiced over them, and in many cases you have sorrowed. They have brought you happiness as no one else could. They have brought you pain as none other could.

You have nothing in this world more precious than your children. When you grow old, when your hair turns white and your body grows weary, when you are prone to sit in a rocker and meditate on the things of your life, nothing will be so important as the question of how your children have turned out. It will not be the money you have made. It will not be the cars you have owned. It will not be the large house in which you live. The searing question that will cross your mind again and again will be, How well have my children done?

If the answer is that they have done very well, then your happiness will be complete. If they have done less than well, then no other satisfaction can compensate for your loss.

The proverb spoken of old said, “Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it” (Prov. 22:6).

Another wise saying reads, “As the twig is bent, so the tree’s inclined”

Teach your children when they are very young and small, and never quit. As long as they are in your home, let them be your primary interest.”

He then goes on to suggest several things we should teach them and if you are interested in what those are I would encourage you to read this talk from him. It is very insightful, but I want to turn now to another talk given by Shirly Klein called Three Tools to Build a Sacred home. We all know that we can not nurture a child in an environment that is not conducive to the spirit. For me this talk really hit home, so Id like to share some of the highlights with you.

She says

“In the Bible Dictionary we read, “Only the home can compare with the temple in sacredness.”4 If our homes compare to the temple, what is it about the home that makes it sacred? One dictionary defines sacred as “belonging to or dedicated to God; worthy of reverence; set apart for or dedicated to some person, object, or purpose; that [which] must not be violated or disregarded; properly immune, as from violence or interference.”5

Apply this idea of sacred to everyday activities in your home such as mealtime, music, recreation, laundry, and caring for your home and yard. Mundane activities can have a higher purpose and must not be disregarded; they give us opportunities to develop and practice character virtues and ethical behavior. By doing these everyday activities, we can learn about moral truths and practice honesty, patience, charity, and brotherly kindness. Everyday work and recreation in the home provide rich contexts for children and adults to make choices and learn from them. For example, a child, a spouse, or even a roommate may choose to contribute in the home by seeing what needs to be done and doing it happily. Or he or she may wait to be asked and then complain about the inconvenience.

Everyday events in our home can seem so simple that we overlook their importance—like the children of Israel who were smitten by a plague of snakes. To be healed they had to just look at the brass serpent on a pole but because it was so simple, many did not do it. “Because of the simpleness of the way, or the easiness of it, there were many who perished” Everyday activities in our homes may be simple, but because they are simple, frequent, and repeated, they offer important opportunities to build individuals and families,

we need to recognize that family activities have temporal and spiritual effects.

Our actions shape the person we become now and in the life to come. For example, as spouses “love and care for each other and for their children,”9 they foster the development of characteristics that enable them and their children to progress in eternity.

If we realize the value of everyday life, we can see that even the smallest child can feel like a valued individual through something as mundane as folding laundry. Little children can match socks, sort colors, fold towels, and be recognized for their accomplishments. Over the years as the tasks’ complexity increases, the children gain confidence in their ability to choose and do worthwhile things.

We often think about family duties in terms of family prayer, home evening, and scripture reading, but we should also remember that activities like feeding and clothing ourselves help us practice love, service, obedience, and cooperation. These simple, everyday routines have great power in our lives.

The Lord promised, “[I] will give unto the faithful line upon line, precept upon precept; and I will try you and prove you herewith” (D&C 98:12).

Prove faithful in the little things, and the bigger things will be added on. Opportunities to learn and practice in the home are sacred; they are times to grow spiritually and draw closer to the Savior. This process of growth is a lifelong quest, and our home environment gives us repeated, sustained chances to practice becoming godlike individuals and families.”

I really had never taken the time to think about it in this way before. I am one of those mothers that has a very hard time with the little tasks of motherhood. But in reading this it has opened my eyes to the importance and the comparisons it has to eternity. I have seen in my own life how these things are true. I have been able to watch my children grow, and start to be able to take care of themselves, and now to be able to help take care of each other through compassion and service. That truly is one of the best feelings in motherhood.

Pressures during these mothering years are not few and far between. Jeffrey R Holland said,

“Even with night feedings and night teethings, often the greatest challenge of all for a young mother is simply fatigue. Through these years, mothers go longer on less sleep and give more to others with less personal renewal for themselves than any other group I know at any other time in life. It is not surprising when the shadows under their eyes sometimes vaguely resemble the state of Rhode Island. what ever else you do, cherish that role that is so uniquely yours and for which heaven itself sends angels to watch over you and your little ones. Sometimes you may think the world expects you to teach your children reading, writing, interior design, Latin, calculus, and the Internet—all before the baby said something terribly ordinary, like “goo goo. But try to recall on those inevitably difficult days when all of this can be a bit overwhelming. Maybe it is precisely our inability and anxiousness that urge us to reach out to Him and enhance His ability to reach back to us. Maybe He secretly hopes we will be anxious,” she said, “and will plead for His help. Then, I believe, He can teach these children directly, through us, but with no resistance offered. It gives hope. If you can be right before Father in Heaven, perhaps His guidance to your children can be unimpeded. Maybe then it can be His work and His glory in a very literal sense.”

He goes on to say

“In Church callings we are subject to release. But we cannot be released as parents. From the first days of human history, the Lord has commanded parents to teach the gospel to their children.¹⁵ Moses wrote, “Thou shalt teach . . . diligently . . . thy children, and shalt talk of [God’s words] when thou sittest in thine house, and when thou walkest by the way, and when thou liest down, and when thou risest up.

come to the Lord in meekness and lowliness of heart and, as one mother said, “pounded on the doors of heaven to ask for, to plead for, to demand guidance and wisdom and help for this wondrous task,” that door is thrown open to provide you the influence and the help of all eternity. Claim the promises of the Savior of the world. Ask for the healing balm of the Atonement for whatever may be troubling you or your children. Know that in faith things will be made right in spite of you, or more correctly, because of you.

You can’t possibly do this alone, but you do have help. The Master of Heaven and Earth is there to bless you—He who resolutely goes after the lost sheep, sweeps thoroughly to find the lost coin, waits everlastingly for the return of the prodigal son. Yours is the work of salvation, and therefore you will be magnified, compensated, made more than you are and better than you have ever been as you try to make honest effort, however feeble you may sometimes feel that to be. And it will make your children whole as well.

Rely on Him. Rely on Him heavily. Rely on Him forever. And “press forward with a steadfastness in Christ, having a perfect brightness of hope.” You are doing God’s work. You are doing it wonderfully well. He is blessing you and He will bless you, even—no, especially—when your days and your nights may be the most challenging.”

I know that I have felt His hand in my life. Despite everything about me all the good, and all the bad, as I have come to Him in prayer, I have felt his strength, his guiding hand, and as I have earnestly pleaded for answer to questions on everything from potty training to health concerns, I have heard his voice tell me that He knows me, He knows my children. That he personally has a claim on each one of them, he has a special purpose for them, and will care for each of us. That even when I feel I am unworthy to ask for a specific blessing, that he will still bless their lives because of their innocent nature. He knows our trials, and their potential, and if I will let him he will guide our lives so that the best may come out of them.

I am so greatful for my three beautiful children, and for the opportunity He has given me to have them and to have one more on the way. They are such a light and joy, and help me to grow in the gospel everyday. Behind every great mom is usually a great Dad. I know I couldn’t be the mother I am with out the help of my husband, and for him I am thanksful. I bare my testimony that I know that families are forever, and that the family is the center of Gods plan for us. That it is essential for us and for our children to be in a loving home, and nurtured by loving parents. I pray everyday I can continue to strive to be the mother Heavenly father needs me to be for them, and I say this in the name of Jesus Christ Amen.